*This is a post about depression and how the Church should handle depression and depressed people. There may be triggers in this article. As always, If you’re depressed, tell someone. Tell a doctor, friend, family member or counselor. Please do not suffer alone, especially if you feel suicidal.
One of the most powerful hymns has a most tragic story behind it. A story of love, a story of loss and a story of coming to radical acceptance of whatever God throws at us. Very much like the story of Job, the author of “It is Well with my Soul” lost everything and never once did he allow his loss to prevent him from following Jesus Christ.
Horatio Spafford had it all! He had married his soulmate, had five children and a career that even modern lawyers would envy and he was a Presbyterian layman. Among his friends he counted evangelist D.L. Moody. Life was great is probably an understatement for what it would have been like to be Spafford. However, tragedy struck the family when they lost their son to Scarlet Fever in 1871. Then in October of 1871 during the Chicago Fire Spafford’s fortune evaporated; having invested heavily in real estate along Lake Michigan’s shoreline, he lost everything overnight. Yet while this is a lot like the story of Job, the truth is that the worst hadn’t come to pass.
Hymnologist Kenneth Osbeck tells the story “Desiring a rest for his wife and four daughters as well as wishing to join and assist Moody and [his musician Ira] Sankey in one of their campaigns in Great Britain, Spafford planned a European trip for his family in 1873. In November of that year, due to unexpected last-minute business developments, he had to remain in Chicago, but sent his wife and four daughters on ahead as scheduled on the S.S. Ville du Havre. He expected to follow in a few days. On November 22 the ship was struck by the Lochearn, an English vessel, and sank in twelve minutes. Several days later the survivors were finally landed at Cardiff, Wales, and Mrs. Spafford cabled her husband, ‘Saved alone.’”
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| Telegraph that Anna Spafford sent her husband |
Imagine getting the news that your loved ones had tragically died. In all honesty, I don’t know if I could say that “it is well with my soul.” However, Spafford immediately left for Wales to be with his wife Anna. Sailing across the very seas that claimed his daughters. It is said that it is during this voyage he penned the the first verse to “It is Well with My Soul.”
When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say,
It is well, it is well with my soul.
At times it can be debilitating, it can be well-hidden so that you can go about your day. It is a disease that can be debilitating and cause further issue with your psychology if left unchecked. Brandon W. Peach states “Depression and anxiety tend to be some of those touchy subjects that are tough to tackle from a Christian perspective. It’s not complicated just because the illnesses themselves are so complex, manifesting themselves in myriad ways, but also because perspectives about mental disorders vary greatly throughout the Church.” (1)
The church I grew up in kept various mental illnesses under wraps and didn’t talk about them, much like many churches in the 1980s and 90s. Then I attended a church in the early 2000s that believed “depression is a spirit, and all you need is a little faith in Jesus!” Even while I was researching this book, I kept running across sites telling me “This is a spirit! Rebuke it!” If only it were that easy. One thing that people don’t realize about depression is that it saps you of everything…including faith.
Dealing with mental illness, like other chronic conditions, can feel overwhelming. Patients often feel as if their diagnosis defines their life, while counselors and even pastors can forget that people with mental illness still have a spiritual life. As a result, churches sometimes miss the chance to minister to those with mental illness.“Because of the way we have ignored mental illness, we are hurting people,” says Ed Stetzer, executive director of LifeWay Research. “We’ve created a stigma.” (2)
So what is depression? It is definitely more than being “blue” or “down in the doldrums” or even the temporary feelings of sadness that we all feel once in a while. Depression affects the mind, the body even the soul. It affects how a person eats, sleeps, their work, their relationships and their self-worth. The good news is that there are effective treatments for depression. The bad news is that only one-third of depressed people actually get appropriate treatment for their depression.
Depression also has many different facets—Major depressive disorder and dysthymic disorder, commonly known as dysthymia, represent two mood disorders classified by the "Diagnostic and Statistical Manual" of the American Psychiatric Association. Both disorders are characterized by feelings of sadness or apathy, but have distinctly different time duration and symptom patterns that must be carefully assessed for an accurate diagnosis. National Institute of Mental Health, major depressive disorder afflicts an estimated 16.2 million adults in the United States. This number represented 6.7% of all U.S. adults.. Dysthymia annually affects approximately 3.3 million American adults, or 1.5 percent of the U.S. adult population. The median age of onset for both diagnoses occurs in the early 30s. (3)
As a sufferer of Persistent Depressive Disorder, I really don’t know what the answer is for “curing” depression. Is it anti-depressants? Is it natural anti-depressants, such as St. John’s Wart? Is it prayer? Is it talk therapy or counseling? Maybe it’s a combination of those things. However, there are things that the church needs to know about the depressed person. Matter of fact, there are a lot of things the church needs to know. Given this information I needed to write this blog—not because I am an expert on depression, psychology or even religion—so that people would realize that just because you can’t see the illness doesn’t mean the illness isn’t there. Just because we smile day in and day out; during sermons or bible studies or even prayer meetings, it doesn’t mean that something isn't wrong—it may not be overwhelming us at that moment, but it certainly could be.
However, I know that you thinking now: you said there are things the church needs to know about depression and anxiety.
1. Depression isn't what churches often make it out to be.
Many churches will make depression out to be character flaw or defect, it’s not a spiritual defect, and it certainly is not a choice. So asking someone to snap out of it most likely isn’t going to help. Matter of fact, it often times makes things worse because the person can’t just “snap out of it” like a lot of people can with a case of the blues.
While many will say it's a spiritual attack, medical science proves that it’s not. Given this information, I will concede that that the enemy will exploit any weakness found in a person—including depression.
2. Depression and Mental Illnesses are not caused by unconfessed sin and it’s not a sin.
Many times we hear Christian people say “So and So wouldn’t be depressed if they’d just confess that sin!” This may be true in some cases however, take my case, I have confessed my sins, and I do a lot of confessing on a daily basis—yet I still suffer from depression. It has nothing to do with my sinful nature. What the ideation behind the “It’s unconfessed sin” does is alienate people in your congregation and possibly causes their friends to walk away too. So alienating is the idea that depression is a demonic spirit or even a unconfessed sin that I refuse to ask people to pray for me.
3. The Bible doesn’t provide easy answers and a strong church can’t fix depression.
I know that sounds harsh and a bit faithless. But it’s simply the truth. The Bible doesn’t provide the “end all be all” answer to help you snap out of depression. It helps, of course, any time that we spend in the Bible helps us—it helps ease the symptom of depression, but it certainly doesn’t fix the issue.
Strong churches don’t fix the problem either. The most Christ-loving and helpful community might not have the appropriate framework for dealing with such clinical disorders, and many churches don’t have licensed psychologists on the staff. And while there are programs like “Celebrate Recovery” can provide an invaluable forum for people to interact with others who experience “hurts, habits, and hangups,” and can help deal with some of the self-medication many people with depression and anxiety use to numb themselves. There may not be a positive response from the group or even the person who is struggling.
Brandon Peach, whose list I have modified somewhat, states “Like the rest of society, however, the Church may misinterpret these clinical conditions and respond to them in ways that exacerbate them—and as a result, demoralize those suffering.” (4)
A diagnosis of depression should not be an automatic switch that causes one to be abandoned by their church. There is a way to support people with depression through the church without abandoning them.
One thing that another believer can do is just be present. Even in times of silence, the presence of another person can lessen the effects of depression considerably. Does this mean you shouldn’t say anything at all? Of course not, rather you should confront the issue, but if the person who is depressed doesn’t want to talk, let them know it is okay to sit there in the silence. Avoid premature reassurance. Although advice and reassurance can do wonders for a depressed person, if they are offered too early they can stifle the expression of feelings. A person who is told to "Snap out of it," or that "Everything will be all right," or even, "Let's pray about it," might infer you don't want to listen anymore. Thus, not only will he oblige by not saying any more, but he probably will withdraw even further into his depression.
"Sitting Shiva" is the Jewish foundation for mourning. In Job 2:11, 13, Job's friends come to him and simply sit with him. This act recognized Job was hurting, afraid, sad, and depressed. They did not offer prescriptions or false assurances, nor did they attempt to talk him out of where he was. In fact, when Job's friends did offer explanations for his condition, his depression worsened considerably! Pastors and fellow church members must also admit their limitations, and be willing to refer people struggling with depression to those gifted and trained to help. Just like a person experiencing a heart attack needs more than a family physician, those suffering from depression often benefit from the expertise of skilled professionals and possibly treatment through therapy.
Ultimately, God will always use the church to bring hope to others who are hurting, because we’ve been where they are and made it to the other side. Hope means the most when it’s come, stumbling, out of the dark places.
*If you’re depressed, tell someone. Tell a doctor, friend, family member or counselor. Please do not suffer alone, especially if you feel suicidal.
1. Brandon Peach, “5 Things Christians should know about Depression and Anxiety,” Relevant Magazine, August 8, 2017, https://relevantmagazine.com/article/5-things-christians-should-know-about-depression-and-anxiety/ (Accessed: August 6, 2018)
2. Smietana, Bob, “GETTING BEYOND THE STIGMA OF MENTAL ILLNESS” Lifeway Resources, November 11, 2014, https://factsandtrends.net/2014/11/11/getting-beyond-the-stigma-of-mental-illness/#.VGN13mRdU4S (Accessed August 14, 2018)
3. National Institute of Mental Health (2017). Persistent Depressive Disorder (Dysthymic Disorder) from https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/index.shtml (Accessed August 6, 2018)
4. Peach, Brandon., “5 Things Christians should know about Depression and Anxiety,” Relevant Magazine, August 8, 2017, https://relevantmagazing.com/article/5-things-christians-should-know-about-depression-and-anxiety/ (Accessed: August 7, 2018)
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