When you are a Christian and single, it’s hard to fit in anywhere. I don’t fit in with my friends—many are dating, or made a life-long commitment to a person in marriage. They may or may not have children. Even at work, I am seen as the “odd one out.” Matter of fact, I am often made fun of. If my co-workers knew me before now, they’d probably not cared to much for me. The first question many of them ask is “Why don’t you date?” Well to be very honest, I haven’t met anyone that I am remotely interested in since I had my heart-broken several years ago. Truth is, the man that finds me will only find me when he is so lost in God, that God has to tell him, “look up, there she is!” The next thing they’ll say when I stand up for Christian beliefs is “Well when you were young you didn’t have social media and sex.” Actually, I hate to tell you this, whippersnapper, my generation had MYSPACE and as for sex, well, they had it, just like generations before them and many of my friends were sexually active and being treated for STDs before they graduated high school. My best friend once told me “I believe my marriage is great because we weren’t having premarital sex, we waited, we were virgins when we married.” And by the way, this marriage has lasted over 16 years—with fidelity. You see that is what God calls for in marriage, purity. When I was 15, I made a promise to abstain from sex until marriage. It was a promise I made myself, my future husband, our future children and God.
God is the center of my life. Is God at the center of your life? Take a hard look at the way you are conducting yourself daily. Is He present? How often are you considering Him? We are always on God’s mind, and He should be on ours. Keeping God at the center of your life is crucial in maintaining a strong faith.
Daily Distractions
God has let us know how susceptible to sin we are, and He forgives us for our transgressions, but often times we find ourselves falling back into our same bad habits. The cycle can be explained by taking a look into our daily routines. What is it that has you placing other things before Him?
Are you obsessively checking your Facebook or Twitter? Are you obsessing over your favorite sports team? People are spending more and more time glued to their computer screens, versus their Bibles. These things are false idols. Be aware of their presence.
Idols can also be the need for acceptance in a certain area. These days, people are searching for acceptance in many ways. Some spend an unreasonable amount of time working on their appearance to be accepted. Others feel money can help define themselves. These are all false ideas of success people are chasing daily, and they can easily lead even the most devout astray.
Matter of fact, among some of my “everyday people” sex, dating and living a life that doesn’t have God at the center and they will tell you they are Christians, but yet it seems that many of them don’t know what it truly means to be a Christian. Now, I am not saying that being a Christian is a killjoy. By all means, Christians know how to have fun, but we also know that fornication is much more than “looking under the hood before you buy a car” or “kicking the tires.”
So what is fornication; Sexual intercourse performed outside the bonds of marriage, considered an immoral work of the flesh (Matt. 15:19 par. Mark 7:21; cf. Gal. 5:19; Eph. 5:3; Col. 3:5; RSV “unchastity, immorality”). (1) In general, illicit sexual intercourse (Heb. zānâ), a sin violating the spirit of the Seventh Commandment (Exod. 20:14), which was meant to protect the integrity of the family. Fornication (Gk. porneɩ́a) can be linked with adultery (Matt. 5:32; 19:9) or distinguished from it (15:19 = Mark 7:21). Committing fornication is noted and rebuked (1 Cor. 6:18; 10:8; Jude 7). Abstaining from fornication (unchastity) was one of the four conditions demanded of the Gentiles for their admission into the Church by the Jerusalem conference (Acts 15:20, 29). (2)
When you read the definition of what fornication actually is, it doesn’t seem like such a great idea. Matter of fact 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 states 18 Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. 19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, 20 for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. (3)
Notice in verses 19 and 20: “Your BODY is a TEMPLE of the HOLY SPIRIT. “YOU are NOT your OWN, you were BOUGHT with a price! Our bodies are not ours to do with whatever we please. In fact, they were given to us by God at the cost of the death of His only Son.
But Rachel, you never really know a person until you live with them? Seriously? That’s an excuse. Matter of fact, it’s a terrible excuse. But Rachel, I’ve already been married and divorced, I’ve been hurt, why should I wait this time around? Again, excuse!
Everything that I have spoke about tonight, boils down to one thing and one thing alone: unbelief. Matter of fact, if Christians and those who call themselves Christians actually believed the Word of God, much of the issues we have wouldn’t be issues. We wouldn’t have Bishops or Pastors lying about their lives to gain position; we wouldn’t have need of special conferences to decide if we should follow the word of God as it pertains to sexuality and marriage! In fact, if these so called christians would actually believe, the WHOLE dynamic of the church would change and the WORLD would take notice! Instead here we are, we are having Christians who want to live like the world and live of the world instead of just in it! Friends, we are called out! Romans 12:2 “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Friends you are called OUT of the world, you are called not be conformed to the ways of the WORLD! ANYTHING LESS is UNBELIEF! Maybe you don’t believe like I do, that is between you and God; maybe you want to look under the hood, but don’t be surprised with the spark plug no longer sparks or the spare is flat because you didn’t care for it! James 4:4 “You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.”
Recenter Him
The good news is, that going astray happens to everyone, and re-centering God in your life is possible with Christian inspiration.
First, become aware of the evil in your life. Things like Facebook and sports aren’t always evil, but if they are slowly causing you to think more about them, and less about God, they may be a problem. Recognize these daily distractions, ask for forgiveness, and work to combat them.
Second, ask for guidance. Changing habits is extremely hard. Sometimes when we give something up, the temptation becomes greater. Ask Him for help along the way, and be open to receiving his plans.
Third, work to serve Him daily. Make extra efforts to do God’s work. Volunteer, be understanding, and share the Gospel with a new soul: This is how Jesus lived his life, and we should follow in His footsteps.
Grow Closer To God
By recognizing our faults and actively working to abolish them, our relationship to God actively grows stronger. It becomes easier for us to see His plan, hear His words, recognize His signs, and trust His love. We become happier in our journeys and more grateful for our blessings.
All of these things make us great examples of His power. He becomes visible inside of us, and lost souls will become more curious. We are better prepared to teach His love to the rest of the world, and have them understand it. Recenter yourself, and elevate yourself to new heights within your life.
- Allen C. Myers, The Eerdmans Bible Dictionary (Grand Rapids, MI: Eerdmans, 1987), 391.
- Allison A. Trites, “Fornication,” ed. David Noel Freedman, Allen C. Myers, and Astrid B. Beck, Eerdmans Dictionary of the Bible (Grand Rapids, MI: W.B. Eerdmans, 2000), 469.
- The Holy Bible: English Standard Version. Wheaton: Standard Bible Society, 2016.
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