However,
my chosen path has never been easy—my family is devoutly
Christian—evangelical Christian. I can’t tell you the times early on
that I tried to express my faith in terms of Judaism and I got taken out
to dinner by family members eager to tell me “Rachel, don’t you realize
that Jesus is the only way to heaven?” While during those early years I
wanted to “please” my family, I realized that pleasing God was worth so
much more than pleasing the family. Even while in seminary at Liberty
University, I chose to write all my papers from a Messianic Jewish point
of view and many times, Professors (men and women with Doctorate
degrees) would email me stating I had made them think differently.
But why did I choose
my belief system? That is my family’s main concern; and how can they
change me. Truth is they can’t change my beliefs. I have chosen to look
at faith through the eyes of a Jewish person. I love Jewish people—and
prefer to work with them and do business with them. But what I really
like about Judaism is that it’s a living faith. Not a faith that starts
out all fire hot and cools with time, but rather it’s a faith that
continues to warm, become deeper and more a part of your lifestyle.
Christianity for its most part becomes a faith that doesn’t deepen,
instead it feels as if you get stuck spinning your tires; while waiting
to see what happens next. You are told to go out and convert others, and
become judgmental. For me, I wanted to stop spinning my tires and start living my faith. There is something sacred about wrapping a tallit around my shoulders before I pray; there is something of blessing that comes with hanging a mezuzah upon the doors of my home—something that says “this is a sanctuary where God dwells.” Rachel the Christian still exists but she recognizes that her heart has had a conversion—and it has become an expression of faith in Hebraic roots instead of in Constantine’s Roman Christian belief.
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